Make Peace with Your Anxious Brain

It’s there when I wake up. Something’s wrong. I haven’t opened my eyes yet. A minute ago I was sleeping. But now I’m awake and it’s there, lurking: Something’s wrong. My breathing tightens. I stretch my legs beneath the sheets. I feel my heart beating. The sense of creeping fear is diffuse, elusive, hard to pin down. It’s like catching sight of something from the corner of my eye. Something’s wrong.

Only nothing is wrong. I know that. I’ve experienced these bouts of dread for as long as I can remember. It’s familiar, which does not help me hate it any less. 

Explaining chronic anxiety to someone who doesn’t experience it is like trying to describe a color they’ve never seen. I have friends who are surprised I suffer from anxiety. After a lifetime of learning to compensate, to push myself beyond my six-year-old fear of joining the Girl Scouts, I do not come across as a nervous Nellie. I am outgoing, talkative, adventurous. Last spring, I planned a Class IV whitewater rafting trip with my husband for three days in the summer. I started dreading it the minute after I booked it. 

I go for long periods when anxiety leaves me alone, and I forget the tightness of its grip. But when it comes back, triggered by stress or worry about an upcoming challenge, it sticks around, greeting me every morning like some noxious troll who won’t shut up. Something’s wrong, it insists, or more accurately, something is about to go terribly wrong. I know this thought is irrational, but that doesn’t stop the spiral of anxiety that ensues. Nerves twitch under my skin. I scroll my list of things to do and feel uneasy, even about the tasks I’m (supposedly) looking forward to. When days begin like this, happiness is not on my agenda.

Too Much of a Good Thing

All animals react when confronted with danger, and that’s a good thing. The so-called fight-or-flight response, also known as the stress response, helps animals either move away from a threat or fend it off. Anxiety—the ability to anticipate danger—is even more of a good thing. Anxious humans who avoided areas rife with predators or saved food in anticipation of crop failure had a better chance of staying alive to pass on their genes. And make no mistake, that’s all evolution cares about. It doesn’t care that we exquisitely anxious humans might survive but be miserable a lot of the time, massaging our worry beads down to nubs. Let’s face it, in the modern world, with far fewer real threats in our environment, many of us are suffering from too much of a good thing. 

Too much anxiety robs you of your capacity for joy. When everyday worry becomes chronic, it can flip over into one of several flavors of debilitating emotional disorders. Some sufferers develop specific phobias—agoraphobia, claustrophobia, social anxiety. Others, like me, suffer from generalized anxiety disorder, a free-floating emotional malady. The National Institute of Mental Health estimates that one in five Americans have had some kind of anxiety disorder in the past year. In turn, anxiety can lead to sleep disturbances, panic attacks, hypochondria, depression. 

With so much misery at stake, it’s a relief to learn that lots of smart people have figured out how to ease anxiety. Whether you suffer from occasional worry or have a full-blown anxiety disorder, it’s possible to become fully engaged in life again. In the last three decades, scientists have decoded the spiral of reactions that, over time, build an anxious brain. Turns out, I’ve wired my own brain to be anxious. The good news is I’m learning to rewire it—and you can, too. The more we know about how anxiety actually works, the better we get at beating back the troll. Or at least making it behave. 

Nothing to Fear But Fear Itself

To understand anxiety, you’ve got to start with fear, because anxiety is like fear run amok. Neuroscientists now know there are two distinct pathways in the brain that trigger the fight-or-flight response. Here’s the most direct one: You encounter something in your environment—a man running toward you with a knife, a car veering into your lane on the highway—and a part of your brain called the thalamus sends visual information directly to an almond-shaped structure called the amygdala. That’s the control center for the fight-or-flight response. When the amygdala detects a threat, it triggers a surge of adrenaline and an increase in blood pressure, heart rate, and muscle tension—to prepare you to act. A few weeks ago, as I rode my bike home, I suddenly braked, turned my handles sharply to the left, and barely avoided being hit by a car that had run a stop sign. I never saw it coming. But my amygdala did, and it may have saved my life.

To understand anxiety, you’ve got to start with fear, because anxiety is like fear run amok.

Here’s the modern glitch in that evolutionarily brilliant response: “We don’t go into fight or flight just when we’re being chased by a bear,” says Adrienne Taren, a neuroscientist and emergency-room physician at the University of Oklahoma. “We’re getting it every time our email pings or we’re sitting in traffic. Our amygdala is just going and going and going.” That constant barrage of low-level alarm is what we call stress.

So where does anxiety come in? Because we’re such imaginative creatures, we can get stressed out by simply thinking about something that may go wrong. The part of the brain that worries about a future event we’re anticipating is the prefrontal cortex, and that’s where the second pathway to anxiety starts—the one that creates that flurry of anxious thoughts you can’t seem to control. Worried thoughts in the cortex trigger a stress response in the amygdala, which explains why we can freak out about things that aren’t even happening. “I think of the amygdala as sitting there watching cortex television,” says Catherine Pittman, a clinical psychologist and coauthor of Rewire Your Anxious Brain. “You can be on your back porch, looking at the beautiful trees, but you’re thinking, ‘How am I going to pay my mortgage with these medical bills? They’re going to take my house away!’ Your anxiety spikes even though nothing around you is dangerous.”

It’s important to realize that the cortex can’t create anxiety on its own. It can only activate the stress response when it gets the amygdala involved. The amygdala, on the other hand, can bypass the cortex, detect threats in the environment, and react, quickly. When I swerved to avoid being hit by that car, my amygdala took over while my cortex was still figuring out what was happening. Similarly, when a veteran feels anxious at what sounds like gunfire, it’s because his amygdala has gone into overdrive. The amygdala is constantly sweeping the scene, comparing our current experiences with associations learned long ago and some that are probably hard-wired. When it finds a match, it compels us to react, even if the current situation really isn’t all that threatening.

The cortex is like a parent who intervenes to prevent a child from acting on his or her impulses. It acts as a check for when the amygdala overreacts, recognizing, for instance, that what sounded like gunfire was actually a car backfiring and promptly tamping down the anxiety. Sometimes, though, the amygdala’s response is so overpowering that it drowns out the voice of the cortex. That’s anxiety in overdrive. 

The neuroscientist whose work led to the realization that anxiety arises from two distinct neural pathways is Joseph LeDoux, the director of the Emotional Brain Institute at New York University. His discovery of a direct neural pathway to the amygdala overturned the conventional wisdom that the cortex played the starring role in creating anxiety and instead placed the amygdala at center stage. This revolutionary development has enormous implications for why some anxiety treatments work better than others—and for why mindfulness approaches are now getting so much attention.

Getting to the Amygdala of the Problem

In the 1960s, people who suffered from anxiety would have been advised, taking a cue from Freud, that they needed to uncover the unconscious forces driving their fears. By the ’70s a more pragmatic approach had taken hold: Learn to change the thoughts and behaviors that lead to anxiety. Cognitive therapy has proven successful in helping people interrogate the negative thoughts underpinning their worries: Are people really judging me so harshly when I give a presentation? And what’s the worst that can happen if they are? Patients learn to question whether their thoughts are realistic or if they’re catastrophizing based on scant evidence.

We now know that cognitive therapy is effective at tackling anxiety that originates from thoughts in the cortex. But it does nothing to tackle anxiety that arises from reactions in the amygdala itself. “Your thoughts can’t change the way the amygdala reacts through using logic or reasoning with it,” says Pittman, who is also a professor at Saint Mary’s College in Notre Dame, Indiana. “The amygdala only learns through experience.” 

So where does anxiety come in? Because we’re such imaginative creatures, we can get stressed out by simply thinking about something that may go wrong.

So how do you target the amygdala directly? One way is through behavioral, or exposure therapy, which helps the amygdala “unlearn” associations it’s made between danger and particular experiences—like encountering strangers, loud voices, boarding a plane, or driving a car. Behavioral therapy uses the gradual, repeated exposure to whatever’s causing anxiety as a way to help the amygdala learn a more neutral association between the experience and our reaction to it.

Another way to treat amygdala-based anxiety is to simply calm down that part of the brain. Medications are one option. Xanax and its other incarnations are members of a class of drugs known as benzodiazepines. “They basically put the amygdala to sleep,” says Pittman. And that works. But if your goal is to lessen anxiety over the long haul, taking benzodiazepines will impede your progress. “What is learning?” asks Pittman. “It’s neurons firing repeatedly so that new connections form. Neurons have to fire to rewire. So if you give someone a medicine that prevents neurons from firing, how is the amygdala going to learn?” Alternatively, the reason that another class of drugs—the selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors known as SSRIs—have proven helpful for anxiety is that they appear to help neurons form new connections. “SSRI’s promote more communication between neurons,” says Pittman. “People start to be able to think outside the box a little.”

But drugs aren’t the only—or the best—way to calm down the amygdala. There’s also the so-called relaxation response. It’s the “rest and digest” antidote to “fight or flight.” Using MRIs, scientists can now see how, just as the amygdala revs up during stress, it calms down when people employ the deep breathing exercises that prompt the relaxation response. 

And that’s part of the reason that mindfulness shows so much promise for treating anxiety. Sitting quietly and focusing on the breath activates the relaxation response. But mindfulness-based meditation combines relaxation with something more: a nonjudgmental attitude toward emotions that arise, an acceptance of whatever happens. What the new brain research suggests is that, by combining the relaxation response with a cultivation of paying attention to our thoughts, we can address both of the pathways that lead to anxiety at the same time. 

How Mindfulness Changes the Brain

Adrienne Taren began studying mindfulness because she was interested in stress. Studies have shown that mindfulness makes people less reactive to stress and better at regulating their emotions. But as a researcher at Carnegie Mellon back in 2012, Taren wanted to know what was happening in their brains. Her first study compared a group of people—not meditators—who exhibited mindfulness as a personality trait with another group with high stress levels. The results were striking. People who scored highly for mindfulness had smaller amygdalas than those who reported high stress. “The assumption is that a larger amygdala is more active,” she says. “If you have a smaller amygdala,you aren’t so stress reactive.”

The next question: Can people who aren’t mindful by disposition rewire their brains to become less reactive to stress? Taren enrolled high-stress, unemployed people in a three-day retreat, where half were taught relaxation strategies. The others were trained in a condensed Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction program. “We wanted to find out if there’s something specific about mindfulness that’s causing these effects,” says Taren, “not just that stressed-out people relaxed and felt better.” Taren measured the amygdala size of both groups, and after just three days of mindfulness training, the meditation group had smaller amygdalas. That suggested they’d actually made their brains more resistant to stress. 

Perhaps even more significant, Taren found that the mindfulness training had weakened the connection between the amygdala and an area called the anterior cingulate cortex, a frontal region responsible for executive functions like decision making and paying attention. Decoupling the stress center from the logic center allowed people to feel more distance from their anxiety, which made it more manageable. “You’re able to just observe those emotions, which dampens the stress response that keeps the front of the brain from working,” she says.

Taren’s work echoes a growing body of research from neuroscience labs across the country suggesting that mindfulness causes brain changes in both the amygdala and the cortex. Neuroscientists are the first to say that they don’t completely understand the significance of these changes. But for now, they do know that breath-focused meditation seems to help people’s amygdalas become less reactive to their own self-critical beliefs. It also makes them less likely to see social encounters as threatening. When people with generalized anxiety disorder are shown pictures of emotional faces—happy, angry, or neutral—their amygdalas react to the neutral faces more fearfully than to the angry ones. “They perceive them as threatening because they don’t know what the person is thinking,” says Sara Lazar, a neuroscientist at Harvard University. “So they go on high alert.” Lazar found that, after mindfulness training, their amygdalas became less dense—the neurons were like trees that had been pruned—and no longer reacted to neutral faces as threatening. 

Mindfulness training also changes the way the prefrontal cortex responds to anxiety.  “Anxious people have that voice in their head 24/7, going:  ‘What if? What if? What if?’” says Lazar. “Normally we completely identify with that voice, but mindfulness helps us step back and change our relationship to it.” Mindfulness works differently from cognitive therapy, which aims to change thought patterns to short-circuit worry. Instead of trying to eradicate anxiety, mindfulness gets you outside of it so it’s just an experience you’re having. That distance helps you endure experiences you find stressful or scary so your amygdala can learn a new way to react. 

Adrienne Taren became interested in mindfulness from the perspective of a stress researcher. But when she saw the changes it evoked in the brain, she began a practice of her own. “I’m the Type A kind of overachiever who developed an anxious personality,” she says. 

Mindfulness has helped her in the emergency room, where she needs to stay in the moment and make good decisions. It also helped after a painful bike accident. Taren is an off-road cyclist who rides on gravel for hundreds of miles, for fun. After healing from her extensive injury, she panicked when she tried to mount the bike for a competition. Her natural reaction was to suppress her anxiety. But her mindfulness training helped her see another way. “I started talking to my anxiety. I was like, ‘Hello, we’re going to be together for the next 20 miles.’ I was able to picture my anxiety as this little bubble of emotion floating along beside me,” she says. “It was almost comforting.”

A Little Fear Goes A Long Way

Around the same time my fear of joining the Girl Scouts was keeping me up at night, a little girl was born in a Midwestern town with a rare genetic disease. By the time she reached adulthood, the disease had entered her brain, destroying her amygdala. That woman, now known as Patient S.M., helped scientists discover the key role the amygdala plays in anxiety and fear. S.M. feels no fear from external threats. 

To me, that sounded like a dream come true. When I first developed a mindfulness practice, I secretly hoped I could shrink my almond-shaped amygdala down to a peanut. To live fearlessly, able to take risks, pursue adventures, connect with other people without holding back out of worry that my body’s nervous system might betray my uncertainties? Sign me up. 

But over the last year or so, my goal has shifted. Extinguishing anxiety is no longer what I’m after. Instead, when anxiety arises, I simply pay attention to its physical manifestations, and slowly—not because I’m wishing it away—my worry recedes. It sounds crazy, but having started on this journey to do everything I could to obliterate anxiety, I’ve learned to value the role it plays in my life. It helps me be more compassionate with myself. It reminds me to trust other people. And that leads us back to Patient S.M. 

She has no fear, so her curiosity knows no bounds. She is aggressively social and wants to interact with every stranger she meets. “She has zero personal space,” says Justin Feinstein, a neuroscientist at Laureate Institute for Brain Research in Tulsa, who’s studied her extensively. “There’s no bubble. She has no discomfort looking you in the eye even if you’re a total stranger.” When Feinstein took S.M. to an exotic pet store, she held a snake and closely examined it, rubbing its scales and stroking its flicking tongue. She wanted to touch a large dangerous snake—asking to do so 15 times—despite being told it might bite her.  

S.M.’s story offers a lesson in the crucial balancing act between letting our curiosity lead us to new encounters and heeding the fear that makes us avoid them. She’s been the victim of assault many times—had a knife held to her throat, been held at gunpoint—because she is unable to recognize threatening situations. To be sure, living without an amygdala is dangerous. But for those of us with the opposite problem, whose amygdalas see threats all around us? We might benefit from paying more attention to our curiosity, the antithesis of fear. 

In the weeks before our rafting trip, my greatest anxiety was of fear itself. I worried what I’d do if my body betrayed me, gasping for breath and panicking. I’d prepared for months, with daily meditation, but even so, my anxiety as we drove to the meet-up point was high. I used every tool in my box: I sang songs on the radio to distract me. I awoke at our campsite by the river the next morning and meditated. Then I took a half tablet of Xanax. 

That first day on the river, I bonded with the four Hawaiian men in our boat. As we crashed over the rapids, I observed “me” in the boat, too busy to feel anxious as we paddled like crazy. My vantage point had shifted: Instead of feeling buffeted by each rapid, I just saw myself paddling down the river. I didn’t once panic…even on one particularly gnarly rapid when we crashed into a boulder and my husband somersaulted out of the boat. He was OK. And—I realized—I was too. For the next two days I meditated in the morning, but I didn’t reach for the Xanax. My amygdala was learning there was nothing to fear. My sensations of anxiety had changed to excitement. By the last day, I felt like I could paddle on whitewater every day. 

I won’t lie: I’ve awoken anxious many days since that trip. But there’s a distance to my angst that wasn’t there before. I’ve noticed that the physical experience of anxiety doesn’t have to spiral out of control, that it can even make me feel more alive. I call this the Anxiety Paradox: By allowing myself to feel anxious, to not succumb to the desire to “just make it go away,” anxiety somehow lessens its grip on my psyche. And that opens up a space to let joy in. 

The post Make Peace with Your Anxious Brain appeared first on Mindful.

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Is the World Overwhelming You?

As fast-paced and crazy as the world is today, it is easy to find ourselves overwhelmed. Are You Being Overwhelmed?     Is the world around us getting to be too much to handle? You only have to watch television or read the many feeds on social media to see that there’s so much going on around the world. Extreme weather conditions, drama in politics, people losing their lives from many different reasons, homes being destroyed by fires or nature taking a turn for the worse. It seems to be getting too much to bring in, and for some, people are scared and nervous. Overwhelmed? What to do. When this happens, I always advise people to pull away from the news and social media, at least for a while. By doing so, you’re not pretending nothing is happening or choosing to ignore it! What you’re doing by pulling back is: you’re remembering who and what you are and acknowledging that you’re made of soul energy. You’re a soul that comes with a body … not a body that comes with a soul. You are a soul first, and stronger than you could ever imagine! And yes! One person can make a difference! When you want to pull back and experience the sensation of being with your soul, or when you feel that you need to slow the pace down when life gets chaotic, close your eyes, put your hands over your heart, breathe, and say to yourself: “Find your center.” By doing so, you’ll connect with your soul, where you’ll discover that you’re able to let go and relax into the present. Once you center yourself, you can send out that peaceful healing energy and thoughts to others. We often forget that we’re all made up of energy, and we’re…

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10 Mindfulness Practices from Powerful Women

We’ve gathered 10 mindfulness practices created by women to help you live a generous, compassionate, healthy life.

1) Loving-Kindness with Sharon Salzberg

Loving-kindness meditations point us back to a place within, where we can cultivate love and help it flourish. Developing care toward ourselves is the first objective, the foundation for later being able to include others in the sphere of kindness. Here’s a simple explanation of the loving-kindness practice, which involves silently repeating phrases that offer good qualities to oneself and to others:


2) Mindful Conversations with Lili Powell

Practicing mindfulness in social interactions isn’t a solo pursuit, or still, or quiet. By definition, you have to be with others, you have to act, and you have to communicate. So what’s a well-meaning practitioner to do? You can get started with these simple practices for cultivating poise in crucial conversations. Start by practicing the following exercises solo one at a time, then graduate to putting them together in conversations with others:


3) Loving Connection with Tara Brach

Tara Brach and her husband, meditation teacher Jonathan Foust, have developed a regular practice for keeping the lines of communication open and maintaining a deep, loving connection. They engage in the practice two mornings a week. Here’s how Tara suggests going about it.


4) Meditation on Your Self-Critical Voice with Diana Winston

There seems to be this epidemic of self-judgment in the world, where people are often self-critical and have a lot of self-hating voices in their heads. Self-compassion is not the build up of self-esteem, because the build up of self-esteem tends to lead people to needing a lot of external validation to feel ok. Instead, self-compassion is the idea that even with all of our flaws, we can still care about ourselves, that we can make mistakes, that we can screw up, that we can have problems, but we’re still fundamentally a good human being.

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A Meditation on Your Self-Critical Voice 

A guided meditation to get familiar with self-judgements and how we relate to our flaws, so that you can cultivate compassion and recognize your own worthiness.
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  • Diana Winston
  • November 6, 2018


5) Radical Listening with Mirabai Bush

We give very little attention to learning to listen, learning to really hear another person or situation. Yet think back to the moments with other people when our hearts were engaged and we felt fed by being together. In those moments, weren’t we hearing one another? Here’s how mindful listening leads to real change:

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Why Listening is the Most Radical Act 

When we think we already know what there is to hear, we are simply moving a little too fast to really listen—That’s where meditation comes in.
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  • Mirabai Bush
  • January 31, 2017


6) Loving-Kindness for Mothers with Sona Dimidjian

The loving-kindness practice that taught in Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy with moms who have a history of depression has been a touchstone for many during hard times. We share a portion of the guided meditation here with you with our wish that you and your children are well and live with ease:

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A Loving-Kindness Meditation for Moms 

Parenting is beautiful and rewarding, and it is hard work, even on the best of days. Try leaning on this mindfulness practice when things get rough.
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  • Sona Dimidjian
  • June 23, 2016


7) Breathing Compassion In and Out with Kristin Neff

The good intentions cultivated by loving-kindness meditation lead to more supportive self-talk and better moods. You can hold your own suffering fully, and also hold the suffering of this other person. Ride it like the waves on the ocean—in and out.

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Breathing Compassion In and Out 

Kristin Neff guides us through a twenty-minute compassion meditation, first directing kind phrases to ourselves and then to others.
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  • Kristin Neff
  • September 4, 2018


8) Taming Shame with Patricia Rockman

Becoming familiar with a difficult emotion means getting interested and curious about it, like you might do when visiting a new city. Take it slow, uncovering new “territory” a bit at a time instead of trying to get to know it all at once. As you do, you learn that you can sit with uncomfortable feelings, and that they will eventually pass. Over time, you develop resilience, self-knowledge, and trust in yourself—the best antidotes to the self-judgmentthat shame inspires.


9) A Meditation for Moving on from Holly Rogers

Sometimes there are things in our life that we’re not crazy about, that are quite unpleasant, very distressing even—and yet there’s nothing we can do about it. And in those moments acceptance, acknowledging what is true without adding on layers of “I don’t want this to be true,” “It’s not fair,” “I don’t like this,” “Why did this happen to me,” can help us get through these difficult times with more ease.

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A Meditation for Moving On 

We can’t ignore the hard stuff. Here’s a 10-minute mindfulness practice for navigating—not resisting—everything life throws our way.
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  • Holly Rogers
  • November 27, 2017


10) A Body Scan with Elaine Smookler

IWhen we can notice what we feel without having to hold on to it, we can let it go and return to the present moment over and over. And that feels damn good.


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10 Powerful Women of the Mindfulness Movement 

There’s a balancing of gender power happening across the professional world—including the mindfulness world. Ten leaders in the field share how they claim their power and bring the diversity of their experiences in the mindfulness movement to bear in their work.
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  • Stephanie Domet
  • January 15, 2019

The post 10 Mindfulness Practices from Powerful Women appeared first on Mindful.

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Transforming Self-Care into a Passionate Movement

Over the past eight weeks, we’ve begun changing our perspective of self-care, taking it from a purely individual pursuit to one that relies on community, and filling our toolbox with best practices, resources, and practical tips along the way.

Now, for this final installment of the “Self-Care in Politically Charged Times” Series, we’re going to start looking at self-care as a societal movement that we must champion. Take a moment to imagine the power of a self-care movement—a wave of kind care connecting communities, healing our bodies and minds, sustaining our energy and momentum, and helping us all live healthier, happier, and more balanced lives.

That’s pretty awesome.

So how do we make self-care a cornerstone practice, bringing it into our social groups, homes, and offices? Before we embark on this journey, I think it’s important to examine and appreciate the rich history of self-care.

The History of Self-Care

The “radical” concept of self-care was born during the civil rights era, a time when brave individuals were fighting the relentless enemies of prejudice and discrimination. These American heroes created the first real communities of care, standing strong together in the face of seemingly impossible challenges and unspeakable treatment.

It can’t be lost on us that one of the concepts they were fighting for was (and remains) the basic human right to self-care. People of color were often denied medical treatment at hospitals and health care centers. The government had turned its back on them. Self-care, quite literally, became a matter of life and death. They were fighting an exhausting battle and the only support to be found was in each other and within themselves.

The basic idea of being able to care for oneself, of having the time, money and resources necessary to do so, was born out of the civil rights movement.

We don’t just deserve to be alive, we have the right to live our best lives.

In our age of bath bombs, drop-in meditation studios and face masks, self-care may seem like a no-brainer, but for populations that were (and still are) marginalized, it was a bold statement and one that should inspire us all today. We don’t just deserve to be alive, we have the right to live our best lives.

Why Do We Need a Self-Care Movement?

What is a movement anyway? A movement is simply a group of people who share a purpose and create change together. Yes, a successful one requires strong leadership and partnerships, support from stakeholders, well-defined goals, and a solid plan in place to achieve them. However, more than anything else a movement requires passionate members. It demands energy and skin in the game from those who want to move the needle and drive the change.

Sound like anyone you know?

I hope so because the times are ripe for change. Following the 2016 presidential election, a growing uneasiness and undercurrent of anxiety has emerged in this country—regardless of who you voted for and what side of the political spectrum you find yourself in. If you ask me, it’s a genuine national health crisis. But it can also be the impetus for a self-care movement that can have a profound and lasting impact on this country.

We have the opportunity to reclaim the term self-care and make it synonymous again with the late activist Audre Lorde’s statement that self-care is “not self-indulgent, it is self-preservation”.

We need to understand that our self-care impacts the lives of those around us in innumerable positive ways.

In order for self-care to become a national movement, we must be clear about what it is and what it’s for: its intention and purpose. The motivation behind self-care needs to extend beyond our own in-the-moment happiness. We need to understand that our self-care impacts the lives of those around us in innumerable positive ways. We need to realize that from a macro perspective, self-care reaches beyond the individual to impact communities, neighborhoods, our nation, and, ultimately, the world.

How to Build a Self-Care Movement: Bringing Positive Change to the Collective Struggle

So, how do we begin building our self-care movement and incorporating it into our communities and workplaces so that “communities of care” become part of the culture? Here are a few ideas. Some are easy fixes. Others are complex issues. But they’re all areas we need to explore:

1)  Let’s Destigmatize Mental Health. As people who have created communities of care around us, we are the leaders of our self-care movement. Let’s commit to bringing positive energy and workable solutions to those struggling with mental health issues. We need to change the way we look at mental health in this country and make sure every person has access to the caregivers, transportation, treatment, and funds needed to properly address mental health.

2) Commit to Sharing Your Self-Care Knowledge. We all have daily routines and personal challenges. But let’s stop trying to go it alone. When we take the time to create space in our schedules for others; when we organize and meet up with our friends and social groups; even when we exchange a few thoughtful emails, we’re building communities of care and, therefore, fueling the self-care revolution — One. person. at. a. time. Let’s become the leaders who create guilt-free and inviting spaces around us. Let’s set the intentions for groups that are making a difference. Let’s make sure that the individuals in our networks enjoy the added support of those in their lives who care.  

3) Help Define the Standards. The slow adoption of self-care in our culture is in big part due to a lack of definition. We don’t know what the standards of self-care are or should be because they’ve never been clearly established. It must be our mission to create a well-defined vision for self-care grounded in real principles and standards. I define self-care as the practice of taking an active role in protecting our own well-being, pursuing happiness, and having the ability, tools, and resources to respond to periods of stress so that they don’t result in imbalance and lead to a health crisis. In my past life, as the President of large service company, when a client would complain about customer service, I would first examine whether or not we, as a company, properly defined the expectations for the client. That’s the idea here. Once we define the standards for self-care, it’ll legitimize our cause by providing a clear roadmap for people to follow. They’ll be able to create a plan, measure their progress, and make changes along the way based on realistic and achievable goals.

I define self-care as the practice of taking an active role in protecting our own well-being, pursuing happiness, and having the ability, tools, and resources to respond to periods of stress so that they don’t result in imbalance and lead to a health crisis.

4)  Understand that Exhausted Leadership is Poor Leadership. Exhaustion leads to shorter attention spans, increased emotional volatility, and poor decision making—Not exactly the qualities of a great leader. That’s why it’s vital that our efforts in leading the self-care movement are sustainable. If we burnout, it will be replicated by our staff, volunteers, children, and others in our sphere of influence. To create a culture of self-care we must be willing to model a sustainable work pace. We must communicate to others that social transformation work begins with the self. When we imagine what advocacy work looks like visually, for example, perhaps we can see it as a series of peaks and valleys. The peaks are where advocacy work happens, and the valleys are where we rest, celebrate and reflect, gathering our strength to climb the mountain ahead.  If we conduct our lives and model this workflow in our organizations, we can build resiliency and make sure that we keep people engaged and ensure that none of us falls victim to burnout.

5)  Ask Reflection Questions to Yourself and Your Team. In the effort to move from reflection to action, and to build momentum to climb that next peak, we should ask ourselves “key questions” that will help us improve our own self-care habits and that of those around us. These questions may include:

  • How does the quality of my leadership diminish due to the lack of my own self-care?
  • Which habit(s) negatively impact my self-care and what new behavior can I substitute it with?
  • Do I have a self-care plan in place to ensure I follow-up on this new behavior and have I shared this plan with others who will hold me accountable?
  • How will I track my progress along the way?
  • How can I best support my staff/volunteers/friends/family members in their endeavors?

The modern self-care movement needs to start as a practice to avoid burnout, rather than as a response to it. The movement must demand that individuals put their health and wellness first without feeling guilty for doing so. If we all collectively share our plans for self-care, we declare boldly that our needs, our state of mind, our body and our overall health matters. We give permission to others to invest in themselves and take the courageous step to acknowledge that they have needs, that their needs are important, and that those needs deserve to be met.

Since this is the last week of the self-care series (or at least part 1 of the series), I don’t want you to feel like you’ve been left high and dry. I am part of your self-care community. Mindful is part of your self-care community. I hope you’ve been joining me in our private Facebook group every week for our live Q&As and meditations. This week we’re meeting on Saturday (11 am ET) instead of Friday for our final session in this series. It’s my hope that everyone will join me, share where you are in your journey, and help me continue this conversation we’ve started. And then, let’s turn this conversation into a Movement!

Thank you so much for joining me over the last 8 weeks for this self-care journey. In truth, we’ve only just begun.

MORE FROM SHELLY TYGIELSKI:

Well-Being

“No” Is A Complete Sentence 

“No” is a word most of us use too infrequently. And, what’s worse, when we say “No” we usually add on all sorts of wheedly explanations. But “No” is a complete sentence, and here’s why.
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  • Shelly Tygielski
  • January 16, 2019

The post Transforming Self-Care into a Passionate Movement appeared first on Mindful.

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Becoming Mindful: A Practice

Before we begin this simple mindfulness practice, allow yourself to find a comfortable resting position, either lying on the floor or sitting in a chair.

1)Bring your attention to the sensations in the body and breath in this moment. Begin by closing or lowering your eyes, and become aware of the condition of your body in this moment. Notice the feeling of your body at rest. Also, notice any sensations of contact between your body and what supports you. Begin to bring your attention to the breath as it enters and leaves your body, letting the breath breathe itself, witnessing this, not having to make it happen.

2) Expand awareness to include the entire body, from the tips of the toes to the crown of the head. You may notice all kinds of sensations, including uncomfortable or even painful ones. You may also be aware of the absence of sensation in some parts of the body. Stay curious and present to whatever sensations are arising, and notice that you may enjoy some of them and disapprove of others.

Stay curious and present to whatever sensations are arising, and notice that you may enjoy some of them and disapprove of others.

3) See if you can bring a soft, curious, and even friendly awareness to these feelings of liking and disliking. Begin to expand awareness to sounds, smells, all of the senses, continuing to notice what is present. Notice any qualities of liking or disliking, of moving toward some experiences and away from others. You can even do this with any thoughts or emotions that may be coming and going in the mind and body from moment to moment, whether these thoughts and emotions are pleasant or unpleasant.

4) Do your best to be fully present to your experience of the moment. Notice whatever is here in terms of sensations, thoughts, and emotions. Notice especially the strong or subtle sense of wanting things to be different than the way they are. You may notice feelings of grief, irritation, or amusement arise as you watch this play of judgments and opinions about what is happening inside and outside you.

5) Continue to stay present to whatever is here. When you feel ready, open or raise your eyes, stretch your body, and move on to your next activity, perhaps bringing this gentle, curious, and friendly attention to whatever you may find yourself doing next.

Learn More About Mindfulness

Meditation

How to Meditate 

When we meditate, we inject far-reaching and long-lasting benefits into our lives: We lower our stress levels, we get to know our pain, we connect better, we improve our focus, and we’re kinder to ourselves. Let us walk you through the basics in our new mindful guide on how to meditate.
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  • Mindful Staff
  • January 31, 2019

Well-Being

What is Mindfulness? 

Are you supposed to clear your mind, or focus on one thing? Here’s the Mindful definition of Mindfulness.
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  • Mindful Staff
  • October 8, 2014

M

The post Becoming Mindful: A Practice appeared first on Mindful.

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Meditation Time

Question:

I was reading some of the different posts on meditation, particularly the post “Length of Meditation”. I personally meditate an hour in the morning, and an hour at night. Is this too long? Should I cut my time down to 30 or 20 minutes? Thank you Deepak, for your insight and wisdom that has totally changed my life.

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5 Ways to Beat the Afternoon Slump

Are you familiar with the mid-afternoon slump? You know, the fog that rolls in sometime between 2 p.m. and 5 p.m., without so much as a warning, destroying your will to do anything except curl up in a ball under your desk. You’re not alone. The afternoon slump is a real, biological phenomenon that lots of people experience every single day. In fact, it’s a sign your internal clock—fluctuations in energy and body temperature regulated by our circadian rhythms—is running on time.

Clear away the haze with a few body-and-brain-boosting tricks—none of which involve pumping yourself full of caffeine or sugar.

But that doesn’t mean the slump has to keep you down. Clear away the haze with a few body-and-brain-boosting tricks—none of which involve pumping yourself full of caffeine or sugar—so you can go forth into the world with a fresh mind.

1. Stretch

Stretching for even 20 seconds can have a huge effect on your energy levels—particularly if you’ve been sitting at a desk for hours. Stand up and reach down to touch your toes; bring your hands together and reach above your head; imagine yourself as a cat to deepen your stretch. Just kidding. (Sort of—if you’ve got a good imagination and like cats, it might help.)

2. Close your eyes for two full minutes

It’s hard to truly comprehend how much time we spend with our eyes widened by the glaring light of our phones, TVs, and computers. Not only is it physically straining, it’s also mentally draining. Place your hands over your eyes for two minutes, and relish the time you have to sit still and be with yourself.

3. Tidy up

When you create an uplifted environment for yourself, your mind and body follow suit. Take a few minutes to clean up your desk, wash a few dishes, or straighten up your coffee table.

4. Call a loved one and tell them why they matter

It’s always worthwhile to extend yourself to others, so pick up the phone and feel your heart swell. It’ll make their day better; it’ll make your day better.

5. Take a walk

There’s nothing like fresh air to perk you up when you’re feeling hazy. And if you spend your days in an office building, the air can get pretty stale. Get up and get out—even if you’ve only got five minutes to spare. It’ll get your blood flowing, your muscles moving, and will offer your mind a fresh start.

This article originally appeared in the October 2016 issue of Mindful magazine.

The post 5 Ways to Beat the Afternoon Slump appeared first on Mindful.

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Tune in: Three Guided Meditations to Conquer Anxiety and Build Resilience

Build Resilience

Uncertainty is like fertilizer for difficult emotions. This meditation reminds you that life is always in flux and the most courageous thing you can do is slow down, turn toward your difficult emotions, and meet them with compassion. By staying with both the highs and lows of your inner experience, over time you become more resilient, meeting each moment with strength.

A 10-Minute Meditation to Work with Difficult Emotions

  • 10:20

Mindful Magazine April 2019 Issue Banner

Respond with Calm

Anxious feelings often provoke us to act in habitual ways. For example, when you’re anxious you may find yourself chewing on your nails or lashing out at close friends. By practicing mindfulness, you can bring awareness to your experience and respond, rather than react, to the moment at hand. This meditation helps you open up, so you can choose whether to engage in a habitual action or simply stay with your feelings.

A 23-Minute Anxiety Practice

  • 22:24

Create Space

When you dig into the storylines that trigger anxiety—whether it be memories, thoughts, or self-conditioning—you begin to give yourself the space you need to live with more ease. This practice helps you acknowledge your anxious feelings rather than fight them. This is a deep investigative practice that can be challenging at times and is best done when you feel safe, curious, and ready to fully explore your emotions.

A Meditation on Anxious Emotions

  • 20:36

The post Tune in: Three Guided Meditations to Conquer Anxiety and Build Resilience appeared first on Mindful.

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How to be Anxiety-Free: Top 10 Techniques

This is a guest post by Ryan Rivera of www.calmclinic.com

Oh my god! It is almost 12 noon and I am still stuck with this report. What will I do? I must make haste! Will I make it? Working in this pace is going to make me lose my job. I’m running out of time! Me? Fired? Oh, no! Rent’s due this Friday. What am I going to do?”

multi tasking

If this is the beat constantly playing in your work life, then I guess it is only a matter of time until this tune will beat the goodness out of you. This melody of anxiety can be quite disgruntling. The stress of trying to finish work before the deadline, the pressure of improving your work performance and the strain of meeting obligations and other responsibilities can cause extreme problems to your nerves.

Mind you. Your nerves can only handle too much. When they get smashed and thrashed all over the place with all the adrenaline and relentless worrying that you do, they will lose their functionality. This, unfortunately, will lead to the development of anxiety disorders.

If you wish to avoid this fate, here are some of the best techniques to help you cope with all the stress and anxiety surrounding you.

1. Calm down

At the first sign of anxiety, keep yourself calm. Your heart may beat so fast. Your breathing may turn difficult. Your muscles may grow tense. Your head may spin around. But never ever lose your composure. Get hold of yourself and try not to panic. The more you fret, the more you worry and the greater and more extreme the feelings of anxiety will become.

2. Take a deep breath

Deep breathing exercises are the easiest and fastest way of keeping yourself calm. When things go out of hand and time seems to be running out, pause for a while and do deep breathing. This simple exercise of filling up your lungs with air will help solve the oxygen-carbon dioxide imbalance that may cause the symptoms of anxiety.

3. Light a scented candle

Certain fragrances from your favorite scents such as lavender, chamomile, and jasmine trigger a relaxation response. Their calming whiff helps to lift your emotions. Hence, when you are feeling a little blue or tensed, light up a scented candle and fill your home with their aroma.

4. Listen to a happy song

Songs as they say are “food for the soul.” They sate the pains, sorrows, anxieties, and worries that lie beneath the core. If you are feeling tensed, putting on your favorite cd and listening to the tunes being played will help soothe your aches and pains. You can try to play songs with lively or positive beat. But it is up to you. What is important is that you enjoy the music.

5. Stretch your limbs

don't panicStrained muscles often need a little bit of stretching to loosen them up. Being slumped in work for hours can cause pressure in your back and muscles. This piled up tension can be annoying and painful at times. Practising some toe touches before you hit the sack for at least 5 minutes will help relieve those soreness and muscle cramps.

6. De-clutter

The mess and chaos of your surroundings greatly add to the anxiety you are experiencing. To trim them down, clearing the clutter from your home can essentially help to de-clutter your mind as well.

7. Ditch the coffee

This step can be a tough one. But taking this can do wonders to alleviate your anxiety. As delicious as coffee can be, you have to ditch this addiction because the caffeine it contains makes your nerves jolt, leaving you anxious from morning till noon. So, wean yourself from coffee soon. Try drinking green tea instead.

8. Visualize greenery

Your imagination is a strong tool that can help you achieve clarity and relaxation. Closing your eyes when anxiety hits and picturing a serene setting where you can escape to and become completely immersed in are effective means of leaving your anxiety out of the picture.

9. Get a massage

A good body massage does not only promote relaxation but also healthy blood circulation. With every inch of your body receiving adequate supply of oxygenated blood, your cells and nerves will be in good working condition. When they are working properly, bouts of anxieties will be prevented. Moreover, massage therapy is proven to enhance EEG pattern of alertness and math computations. So, pamper yourself. Go to a spa and get your needed massage.

10. Munch on chocolate

Chocolate acts like an amphetamine in the body. It helps to increase your mood leading to feelings of happiness, alertness and excitement.
Just take it in moderation. Eating more than enough is no longer good for the body.

To be anxiety-free takes dedication. You need to commit so that the process will be successful. You can follow these simple techniques to get started. They are proven to help resolve the worries and fears you are experiencing. Take your pick and see what works for you. The changes won’t be overnight though, but you’re on your way.

 Photos by MCCchurch and Jim Linwood on Flickr

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